


Red Petals

by Way_too_involved



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), HARD, Hanahaki's disease, Hunk & Lance (Voltron) Friendship, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Lance Sierro, Langst, M/M, Oblivious Keith (Voltron), Oblivious Lance (Voltron), POV Keith (Voltron), POV Lance (Voltron), Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Lance (Voltron), Wanted to change the last name :), kangst, klangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-28
Updated: 2018-08-28
Packaged: 2019-07-03 18:03:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15824124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Way_too_involved/pseuds/Way_too_involved
Summary: "The petals' colors identify the person you are in love with.""How?""Well, they are the color you associate that person with."---They finally reached Earth, a different kind of hardship comes to light.You see, Lance Loves Keith. Keith Loves Lance.Neither knows about the other yet they might actually not get to the confession part of their 'relationship'.





	1. One

Landing safely, in one piece, on Earth was the biggest relief to the Paladins and their companions. They have been travelling for about 2 months, if their devices were correct, and it was starting to show with how exhausted everyone was. Stress was catching up to them, some more than the others – namely Lance and Allura.

Lance felt for Allura, losing her home again as well the news of more Alteans, not only alive, but tortured and harvested for Lotor’s own personal gain. Romelle’s full story left Allura in tears and the others heartbroken with guilt for believing the Galran Prince’s lies.

The ex-Blue Paladin stood at the shore overlooking the ocean after literal hours of begging Allura for Cuba to be their safe haven for a few days as he missed his large family immensely. The sunset left a red-ish hue on the water, adding to the moment’s perfection. The true heat coming from the pure earthen sun and the air mixed with salt and Lance knew he was home.

After dark, he trekked back to his home where he left the others to be attended to by his parents as they set up the extra rooms and couches for sleep space. His mother shocked him with the news that most of his siblings moved out while he was gone. His older siblings, their spouses and their kids all got homes on the same street to grow their families, leaving his parents and the twins. The old bedrooms now occupied by the ex-ship residents.

He suggested anyone sleep with him in his room on the couch he had in the corner if they want but they all collectively agreed that Lance should enjoy his room at his house, alone. Everyone knew how intense his homesickness became the last year in space, not even close to being matched by Hunk’s as the Yellow Paladin made peace with being away from his mothers a long time ago.

His father and Hunk were having a conversation in the garage, something about their car and fixing something, Lance never really payed attention to this kind of stuff. Shiro and his mother were talking old recipes, apparently his mother always wanted to learn the Japanese cuisine and Shiro had mentioned that he had some memorized and was willing to share with his mother.

_Only some though! My mother loved secrecy about her magic soups_ Shiro had joked at one point.

Lance learned that Shiro’s father died in a pilot error when he was 15, which ultimately killed his mother from heartbreak not long after, leaving Shiro in the foster system in his sophomore year of high school where he met Keith. He kept her recipes memorized to remember her in food in times of need.

He turned his gaze to Keith sitting on the couch with a cup of green tea in his hands. Tension wrinkles smoothed on his face with the domesticity shown to him, something he suspected the ex- Red Paladin hadn’t seen in a while. His hair was tied in a bun and his armour exchanged with a hoodie from Lance’s older siblings stash of clothes left here and some sweat pants. He looked absolutely serene. The Cuban didn’t want to blink as to not miss a single second of… this.

He thought of the last time they truly talked and what it had caused him. The pain of suppressed coughs and hidden bloody tissues that serve as a reminder stacked in his pant pocket.

_They had estimated two more days to reach Earth and everyone was super excited and nervous at the same time. They sat around a make shift fire, something they are now becoming experts in making and destroying in a matter of seconds in case of other inhabitants on the planet._

_Food was distributed all around proceeded with soft chatter of what they missed the most about Earth and what to expect. Romelle listened to everyone; her eyes sparkled with wonder at everything anyone mentioned, especially at Pidge’s description of Pizza._

_Pidge sat next to Hunk with his arm around her shoulders, Shiro and Allura were basically spooning in front of everyone while Coran glared at them with the disappointed father look. It wasn’t as to what it meant more like no-PDA-no-matter-how-platonic-it-actually-was. Krolia and Romelle sat next to each other with Cosmo between them completely relaxed and sleeping with both women scratching behind his ears._

_Lance was too aware of Keith sitting next to him, their shoulders slightly touching, heart beating too fast to be healthy at this point and Lance was shocked as to how Keith didn’t hear it yet. He tried to normalise his breathing while thinking of a specific turning point for Keith to have this kind of reaction on Lance. When no_ one _memory popped up, he settled on the fact that Keith always did this, he just pushed it to the back of his mind to not think about it too much._

_“I personally just miss my family.” Lance said with a fond smile not really looking at anything in particular. “My brothers and sisters._ Dios _! Mama’s food!!”_

_“How many siblings do you have?!” Keith blurted, slight feint redness covering his cheeks. Lance filed it under the aftereffects of the heat on the planet._

_“What Keith meant was you always talk about a big family, you can’t possibly have that many siblings.” Allura laughed._

_“I do!” Lance beamed at the chance to talk about his family. “I have three older brothers and two older sisters! That also means that I have nephews and nieces. Who knows how many more I have now after leaving for this long… I also have twins younger than me, we were so close…”_

_Lance saw Keith and Shiro share a pointed look; he was probably bringing the mood down with that last comment. He tried not to but it was this constant fear that he was missing too much of his family’s life. He was gone too long._

_“I’m sure your family would enjoy the chance to talk to you about what you missed, people sometimes like to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.” Keith smiled at lance but the words played too much in his mind. Was this what Keith thought of when he spoke about his family? That he liked to talk about himself too much?_

_He felt a cough tickling his throat but he suppressed it and pushed it away._

_“Yeah… Probably.” He didn’t speak much after that the whole night but that didn’t stop him from paying too much attention to every single word that Keith said, every breath he took and every sound he made._

_Lance took a deep breath, feeling overwhelmingly breathless. There was this crushing pressure on his chest that won’t go away no matter how hard he tried. Tiny pricks on the inside of his throat that just begs for release._

_He stood up too fast and ran to the nearest clearing away from the others. He doubled over in a coughing fit that he was sure was going to result with losing a lung. The Cuban felt an actual velvety feeling clawing its way up his throat making its presence known. After a few more tries he finally succeeded in extracting it to see a red… petal._

_It was like he was drenched by ice bucket, the shock vibrating his every nerve. He didn’t need a doctor to tell him what he had, he already knew; Hanahaki’s Disease. He actually had Hanahaki’s Disease. Lance knew he felt too much but not to the extent where he might actually die._

_He brought his hand to his mouth as his thoughts were cut off by another fit, this time when he removed his hand it was coloured crimson._

He didn’t remember much after seeing red. Only that he ended up in his Lion and just laid there for hours looking at the ceiling thinking of a way to tell Keith about his feelings for him, but the more he thought about it the more it seemed like a farfetched dream. He knew Keith didn’t take him into high regards from the way he talked to him, not that it stopped Lance from falling for him… hard.

He tried distracting his mind by sitting next to the twins on the floor while they played with his Bayard. Seeing them both as old as 17 was heart-breaking for him; solidifying how long he was gone. Five years… Five long years. Marco’s hair was long reaching his shoulders, highlighted with blue streaks, though tied in a bun at the moment. He was the one who gave Keith the hair tie because Veronica’s was a pixie cut.

He almost didn’t recognise his younger sister when he first arrived due to how drastic her change was. Her usual long brown curls exchanged with a pixie cut with a shaved side that had two carefully drawn parallel lines in the middle. It was beyond beautiful in his eyes and he was never as in awe with her as he was the minute he walked into the house. She also apparently came out while he was gone.

They were alike yet so different, the Sierro Twins.

“So what you are saying is that you saved our bother’s ass too many times?” Vero looked at Keith, a twinkle in her eyes. “Man, I am going to have blackmail material to last a lifetime.”

“How do you open this? Is it heat registered? Does it have to do with DNA?” Marco was moving his Bayard in all directions pushing every single button-looking edge. “But if it was DNA then it should open to me, right! I am his brother.”

Keith smiled at her reaction and looked at Marco. “No, you are supposed to be a Paladin to actually open it. Besides, you are not identical to Lance so even if it was with DNA, it wouldn’t open with you.”

Lance felt a pang at Vero’s comment. _Keith doesn’t think of you as competent._ His brain added. _And you want to tell him of your feelings? You can’t stop the inevitable._

“Well we are a team and we all saved each other’s asses” Keith giggled. “But yes Lance wound up in the healing pods way more than anyone else.”

The twins laughed at that. “Dude you have to tell me about every single time.” “Yeah, all the stories! We want to know everything about Lance in space.”

“Well, it was quite an experience.”

“Yeah I bet it was.”

Lance smiled at the interaction trying to hide the hurt. He knew he was a pain in Keith’s ass, but not that much. Did Keith hate hanging out with him that much?

_Of course he did._ A voice supplied. _Why else would he leave the only people he knew in space the moment you showed him how much of a burden you really are?_

He didn’t quite catch what the twins said to Keith but the laugh it got from him was enough to knock the wind out of Lance… literally. The previous pricks came back with vengeance and it was harder to breath by the second.

He wasn’t aware of the fact that he was hyperventilating until he felt a soothing hand rubbing his back. It helped but not as much as he wanted. He looked up and found Keith’s face too close to his lung’s liking and he coughed even more. Concerned violet eyes searching his face for answers he couldn’t give, not ever.

“That’s it. Deep breaths”

He followed Keith’s orders until his breathing soothed, not back to normal, but still slightly better. He sat straight with his back leaning on the couch for a sense of stability. He slowly opened his eyes and took in his surroundings. Keith was kneeling infront of him with a worried expression.

“What was that?” Keith’s voice was uncharacteristically low and gentle. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you have a panic attack before.”

_Panic attack? Is that what he thought this was? Good._

“Just thought of something…” Lance replied, playing to the idea. He had had his fair share of panic attacks in his life and knew what they felt like. “I couldn’t stop.”

“Yeah… I get it.”

“I have to go.” Lance made to stand up but hand held him firmly to the ground preventing him.

“You won’t be okay for a while after that attack. Stay here and I’ll get you some water.”

After making sure Lance wasn’t going anywhere, he made his way to the kitchen. In the meantime, Lance thought about how utterly dead he was. Every action Keith seemed to make made whatever this thing was worse. He loved the Texan too much that if the disease didn’t kill him, Keith not reciprocating his feelings will (aka. Rejection) which ultimately was what the disease made sure of.

Keith returned not too long after with a glass of water and Hunk trailing behind him.

“Heard you just had a panic attack, Man you didn’t have one of those in months.”

“Months?” Keith exclaimed.

“Yeah. Lance and I met on the couch waiting to go to the counsellor for our anxiety. Remember, Lance?” Hunk smiled at Lance.

“How could I forget?! You asked me to be your friend that day.”

“Yupp! Best decision ever!”

“Aww buddy! You are the best.”

Keith raised his arms up to bring the attention to himself.

“Not that this isn’t the cutest shit I’ve seen, but why did you think both of you living together at Garrison was a good idea considering you both had anxiety?!”

“Hunk thought that since we both have it, it would do us good to look after each other if not after ourselves. I took care of him and he took care of me.”

“I never knew you had anxiety.” Keith turned to Lance. The Cuban’s eyes focused on the floor. Talking about his anxiety wasn’t something he wanted to open up about to the one person he is trying to supress his feelings from.

“There are a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

“I’m pretty sure I got the gist of it.” Keith rolled his eyes and smiled. Lance chest tightened at the sight. “I’m going to go see Shiro, you’ll be okay?”

“I’m not invisible, you know.” Hunk sighed. “I’ve been taking care of his ass for years.”

“You know what I mean.” Keith said, walking out of the room back to the kitchen. Hunk looked at Lance, raising a brown eyebrow.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

Lance sighed. Hunk was the last person he was trying to hide anything from. Mainly because he knew it was fruitless. “I… I think I have…” He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms trying to conjure the right words for this situation.

“Take your time, buddy.” The Samoan boy sat next to Lance at the couch and rubbed his back. It was always a calming gesture he would use when he saw the other stressed while trying read something. It wasn’t that he could read, it was because after a long day his eyes became blurry and he stops comprehending any word written on the paper he was supposed to learn.

Instead of saying it, he dug up the red petal from his pocket and held it up to Hunk. He hoped he would understand what it meant without having to explain.

Hunk was quiet for a few minutes, the gears in his brains almost audible. A sharp intake of breath and a low “No…” and Lance figured out he understood.

“You are sure its Keith?”

“You know I am.” He didn’t know what more to say. He had had a crush on his back at Garrison, but that was all that it was. A stupid, silly crush. It wasn’t a fatal disease that put an expiry date on his life.

“Tell him.”

“No.”

“Why? You could die, Lance. You understand that right?”

“Because… I just can’t okay.”

He got up and made to leave when a hand held his wrist.

“I can’t lose you. Keep that in mind.” And with that, he let go of Lance.

Walking up the stairs was much more of an effort that he would admit. He was completely breathless by the time he reached the top, his lungs feeling like sand paper and his head like it was going to explode. He bent down trying to calm his breathing before finishing his trip to his room.

“You sound like you are dying.” The hoarse sound of Pidge came of one of the twins’ rooms. “If anyone asks, I didn’t give you whatever bug you caught from me.”

“I don’t have a bug.”

“Well at least a bug is curable. What the hell is wrong with your lungs then?” she approached his and rubbed his back gently to ease his breathing. This seems to be the running theme with everyone who saw him.

“Nothing. I’m fine.”

“And I am a forty-five year old French woman.”

“You could be with that sass you know.”

“Yeah yeah. Just tell me what’s wrong.” She creased her eyebrows in a way that said _I am worried and you better tell me before I probe you myself and find out._

He stood up and walked to his room away from her… probing eyes. Leaving her with a quick “ _Don’t worry about lil ol’ me pidgey!”_ and locked his door.

* * *

 

When Keith walked into the kitchen for the second time that day, Shiro was sitting on the counter with a notebook and a pen and the concentration of a military man getting his debriefing.

“And then you add seven tablespoons of coco powder to the mixture. Now you remember what I told you before?”

“Yeah… you mix the dry ingredients first then add the liquid ones.”

“Good.”

He smiled but it quickly fell when he remembered why he was here.

“I really hate to disturb this wonderful episode of… I don’t know a Food Network show or something but Mrs. Sierro I was wondering if I could ask you a question.”

“Anything, my boy.” She smiled at him though he could tell a hint of concern was in her tone. She must’ve read his face well.

“I just found out Lance used to have anxiety… did he take medication for it?”

“Why did something happen?” The pot she was stirring was quickly placed on the counter. While she was taking off her apron, she muttered in quick Spanish and the words “Lance” and “Hunk” came in clear to Keith a few times.

“Nothing serious happened, Mrs. Sierro.” He tried to calm her down. “He just had a small panic attack and I called Hunk and he calmed down. They mentioned how they met at the counsellor’s office and that’s how I found out he had anxiety.”

“I never knew he had anxiety.” Shiro sound so tired and defeated. He imagined how bad he must feel not knowing that two if his crew… friends used to go to a councillor for actual mental illnesses.

“He used to.” Lance’s mother sighed. “After he was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety, he was prescribed medications for them. He finished his anti-depressants dose before going off to Garrison but he still had the anxiety ones. The doctor said he might always need them.”

Shock and horror reflected on the Black Paladins. Their happy, lively Lance used to take anti-depressants and they never knew. They never even guessed he could be remotely that sad, not to the extent that he would be diagnosed with clinical depression. Keith knew how hard and bad he had to fight for recovery.

“His medication is in his room at the top shelf. If you think he needs them, that’s where they are.”

Keith thanked her and left. He could faintly hear Mrs. Sierro and Shiro talking about Lance and his past. He wanted to know more about Lance but he already felt bad for not asking the boy personally about all of this. He needed to be ready if something was to happen and to take precautions for the future. Maybe if they take his medications they could refill it later.

The thought of anything making the said boy feel anything remotely negative left a sour taste in Keith’s mouth. His happy image was etched in his memory, an image he would love to preserve and keep it as real as possible. He would go to the ends of the world for his team’s happiness. For Lance’s happiness. This whole thing made him see Lance in a different light.


	2. Two

As he walked up the stairs and heard coughing from one of the closed doors. Namely Lance’s. The coughing sounded so wet and serious that his own chest vibrated with each one. He moved closer to the door, leaning to listen more clearly.

_“Stupid Hanahaki’s disease. Stupid Lance. Dios, Por favor I don’t want to die.”_

Hanahaki’s? Unrequited Love?

Keith knew he didn’t have a chance with Lance, but he didn’t know to what extent he was out-matched. The Cuban made it very clear he didn’t take him seriously, let alone romantically. And now it was bluntly clear he was **in love** with someone else. In love so much that he might die. Who could it be? Allura? He knew the Red Paladin liked her, but that much?

He knocked at the door **once**. No reply. **Twice**. Still no reply. Lance probably couldn’t hear him over the sound of his own coughing. He opened the door and braced himself for the sight. Blood was everywhere. He must’ve moved while coughing and got it across the room. Lance was extremely pale, hunched over the pillow at his lap trying to suppress his coughs. Keith looked for petals, the only indication beside Lance’s word to who Lance loves this much.

“I’m fine.”

“And I am bugs bunny.” Keith ran to get towels as the pillow seemed to be soaked through. He gently removed the pillow and threw it on the floor, which was also soaked, replacing it with the new cloth. “Don’t lie to me, Lance. I heard you.”

“I can explain.” Lance said, sounding desperate. Why would he sound desperate? The whole universe knew he was in love with Allura. Heck Allura knew…

Why someone would get Hanahaki’s if the diagnosed’s feelings were known by the recipient. Shouldn’t he have died a while ago then? Didn’t the disease kill if the feelings were known and not reciprocated?

“Hey it’s okay… Just try to focus on taking deep non-life threatening breaths first.” Keith tried. “There should be petals… Pink, right?”

“Pink?” Lance said hoarsely.

“Yeah… it’s the colour I associate with Allura. I assumed everyone did.”

“Allura?”

“Yes, Lance. Allura. Oh my god… Are you starting to forget? I thought this happened after you did the surgery. We have to do the surgery, I ha-“

“Hey! Calm down!” More wet coughs followed. He paused for a few minutes until it passed. “I know who Allura is. I remember her. It’s… it’s not her, okay. I am not getting the surgery.”

“You are going to die.” Keith internally winced at his own bluntness. “I’m sorry.”

He almost didn’t register the sound until he looked at Lance and realised he was chuckling.

“Always trust Keith Kogane to be honest. If I get the surgery, I might as well have died.”

“But if it’s not All-“

Keith was about to ask who it was that caused Lance so much when the door almost broke in half right before their eyes with Shiro and Hunk on the other side. They were both panting with red faces and sweat dripping to oblivion.

“Lance. Are you okay?!”

“Holy shit, this looks like a crime scene.”

“Keith what the hell did you do?”

“God I should’ve stayed longer.”

“Lance?!”

Questions were thrown for the next few minutes till they calmed themselves to even listen to the Black and Red Paladins, who looked at the two males like they grew a second head.

“It’s Hana-.”

“It was a nosebleed.”

Keith looked at Lance, confused to how easy it was for him to lie to their faces. Keith already knew, why shouldn’t the rest of the team know? Especially since it wasn’t Allura.

“A nosebleed did all this?” Shiro exclaimed, raising an eyebrow. “Lance… you shouldn’t be ashamed of anything with your team.”

“Seriously… Just a nosebleed. Why did you guys run here like that?”

“You were coughing horribly. The whole house heard. Mrs. Sierro went to get your father, who I think might call the ambulance.”

“What… Ambulance?!”

Keith looked around the room and understood the panic.

“Keith… Tell them it’s nothing serious. I am fine!” Lance’s eyes pleaded for him to take his side. He contemplated doing so but his pale face and blood stained floor, towels, sheets and pillows held him back. Lance needed help. He couldn’t fathom a life where he could’ve saved Lance from… dying.

“Keith?” Hunk looked at him. His entire demeanour terrified for his best friend. Hunk’s eyes kept moving between Lance and Keith as if he knew something but didn’t know how to articulate it.

“He’s sick.”

“Sick?”

“Shiro… It’s Hanahaki’s.”

Many emotions passed on Shiro’s face: Confusion, shock, despair and horror.

“Who is it!?” Shiro ran and knelt at Lance’s bed. “You have to tell me who it is, Lance. This could kill. I don’t know if you know much about this but this is very dangerous and not a laughing matter.”

Lance stared at Shiro for a few minutes before he anger flared on his face. He pushed Shiro and stood. He almost lost his footing, if it wasn’t for the bed’s headboard. His pale face was a huge contrast from his usual tanned complexion.

“Lance…” Hunk started before getting cut off by Lance.

“I am not an idiot. Contrary to popular belief.” He looked at his leaders. “I have been going through this for the past few months, okay? I’ve read about this before and I know people who personally went through this too. So don’t treat me like I am **the dumb one**.”

The last statement was directed to Keith. Memories of the game show flashed in his mind.  Guilt and rage ran his blood cold. _Was that the impression he gave Lance? That he thought he was the dumb one?_

_I wouldn’t want to spend an eternity with Lance._

Yes. He didn’t want to spend an eternity with Lance because a few months with him, light-years away from earth, were enough for Keith to completely lose his goddamn mind. The ex-Blue Paladin was… extraordinary, to say the least.  He caught his eye from back at Garrison and he didn’t know how to go about with it, not that he had any guidance on this matter. He saw how free Shiro was with Adam and how happy it made him feel to be out. But those two were bigger awkward idiots than Keith.

“You are not the dumb one, Lance. No one thinks that of you.”

“Coulda fooled me.” Lance glared at Shiro. Keith had a feeling this was long overdue.

“Lance. No one thinks you’re dumb, man. You are a jack of all trades. Yes, you don’t have one particular skill, even though your shooting is superb, but you can adapt. Allura told me about how quick you were able to train with your sword when you got it. Add on that the fact that you are a people smart person. You can comfort anyone regardless of who they are. Don’t deny it; I’ve seen you with children and other alien victims after our missions.”

Lance’s blue eyes were wide looking at Keith. He internally yelled at himself… he might as well confess at this point. Jesus. Lance took a step towards Keith, everyone held their breath. He subconsciously braced himself to be hit. You don’t tell someone all that when you know they are so deeply in love with someone else and they are basically dying because of it and it’s too late.

“Keith, I-“ A wet fit of coughs takes over Lance. He shakes and falls onto his knees. Blood spills on his already stained shirt and floor. He tries to say something but his chest-shattering coughs make everything nonsensical.

When his sharp coughs didn’t stop for a couple of minutes, Hunk ran out of the door to call someone. Shiro and Keith each took a side and held him upright to prevent pressure on his lungs.

“Shiro, he’s choking. What the hell do we do?”

“I don’t know, I am thinking.”

“We can’t lose him, not like Diane.” Shiro looked at him with sad eyes. Diane was a friend that went to Keith’s old school. They stayed in touch even after he went to Garrison. She fell in love with a girl in her class, someone she couldn’t have. Unrequited. And when she confessed, the girl she fell in love with, didn’t reciprocate her feelings. Not in that way.

This whole situation was why Keith was terrified of Love, of falling for someone he couldn’t have. Of falling for someone who wouldn’t think of him in the same why he did. Bringing into light… Lance. He was straight and so obviously in love with girls that it was painfully clear Keith didn’t stand a chance. So sue him if he didn’t want to spend an eternity with Lance.

“The ambulance is here!” Hunk declared with two paramedics trailing behind him. Lance was starting to lose consciousness from the lack of air and the exhaustion due to the strain on his lungs. He could barely keep his head up without help.

The paramedics took Lance from the Paladins and lay him on a gurney. Keith watched in awe as the female paramedic took a syringe and pierced the space between the rib bones, under his arm, and how the blood filled in his lungs was drained into the tube. They lifted the gurney up and began to take him to the ambulance.

“Shiro, I have to go. Please.” Shiro looked at Keith’s desperate face and “Go. I’ll meet you there.” was all he needed to hear before he walked into the ambulance with Mrs. Sierro to get to the hospital.

Mrs. Sierro held her son’s hand, her thumb massaging his knuckles. At this moment, she looked way older than she did when she was teaching Shiro tips in the kitchen. Her lost son returned from war, beaten and scarred, to get sick and be taken to the hospital. Hadn’t this boy suffered enough?

* * *

 

Lance woke to the white florescent lights of the hospital. He really hated this place.

When everything came to focus, he looked around the room and noticed he was alone. He stayed completely still, taking in everything at once. He collapsed at his house after Keith made that speech. What he said was everything Lance had ever wanted to be told. He always felt like he was either a nuisance or invisible to the Black Paladin. Especially after he came back from the two-year getaway with his mother at the quantum abyss. Keith simply didn’t have time for him anymore and he didn’t take him seriously, not that he did in the first place.

A young doctor walked in with a clipboard, no doubt containing his condition’s details, and stood in front of his fluid bags to note down the levels of the medicines injected into him.

“What time is it?” His voice sounded as hoarse as it felt. It was like rubbing sandpaper against the walls of his throat.

“6 pm.” She replied. Lance smiled, tried to, at her. She had a lovely accent. “You’ve been out for about three hours now.”

_Oh._

“My parents?” _Keith_?

“Are waiting for you outside.” She looked at him and hesitated for a second before continuing. “Before we bring them in, I wanted to tell you that we removed as much of the petals as we could without removing the actual cause. We need your consent for that. The petals are stored in a safe place and can be retrieved if you want to.”

“Did anyone see them?”

She smiled sadly at him. He hated the pity.

“No. We have a strict protocol in case of Hanahaki’s disease here. We hide the petals in case the identity could be known to someone without your consent. They demanded though.”

If the others were out there, then he thought they might. They are the only ones who might figure out its Keith. But they were just petals.

“Identified?” He questioned. How could someone know from petals?

“The colour of the petals is related to the person. If you identify someone with a specific colour in your mind, that’s the colour of the petals.”

So because Keith was the original Red Paladin and he kept thinking of him as the original paladin for Red. He was met with Red petals.

“Oh okay.”

“Do you want me to send for a specific person or your parents?”

“My parents.”

“You should tell him, you know. He might actually feel the same way.”

He turned to the doctor faster than his head could handle. Was this Allura in a shape-shifted form?

“What?”

“The boy with the hoodie and the long black hair. He’s been sitting on the floor outside your room the whole time. He didn’t move once. He was shaking and saying he should have noticed you were suffering for months. Poor boy blames himself for something out of his control.”

 He thought more about what Keith said. He complimented him better than his mother had ever done. He noticed things about him, the things he didn’t talk about. He noticed his real self instead of the persona he made everyone believe he was.

“Can you send in just Keith, please?”

She hummed and left the room. He was about to break a promise he made to himself. But hey! He was dying anyways, right? He chuckled self-deprecatingly.

“God… They cut off part of your brain and now you completely lost your mind.” Keith said nervously as he walked into the room. _Without knocking,_ he thought.

“Heard you were worried about me, Mullet.”

“I am.” He said earnestly. “And it’s not a mullet anymore, you know.”

He coughed slightly before continuing.

“Right… Now you fit your emo brooding persona with that hair.”

“Ha. Ha.”

They both fell silent as words hung between them. There was so much that they both wanted to say but neither knew how.

“Listen, Keith.”

Violet eyes met blue.

And for the first time, he thought he might actually have a chance at this.

“I am going off the words of the doctor that I literally met five minutes ago. So if I read into this wrong, please blame her and not me.”

“What are you trying to say?” Keith low voice sent shivers down Lance’s spine.

“Fuck… I am dying anyways, right? What have I got to lose? My dignity? Yeah screw that… Anyways, I care about you okay? I care about you a lot. I might even love you. This stupid Hanahaki’s Bullshit wasn’t how I wanted you to find out. In fact I didn’t want you to find out. I was so disgusted and angry that I fell for someone I couldn’t have… not because you are a guy, but because why would you love me? I am this screw up that doesn’t seem to get his head out of his ass most of the times. I am not a genius in the things that matter. You said I was people smart, well people smart doesn’t come up with an upgrade that saves our asses, book smart does. People smart doesn’t help in planning a strategy for a battle formation, book smart people do. So why would you fall for me? Not when you deserve so much more.”

Lance wanted to say so much more but his throat clogged up and his lungs decided to seize. He took a breath, granted it felt like breathing through a straw, but still a breath nonetheless. Keith’s face was unreadable. He seemed to be a melting pot of emotions and he couldn’t figure out a single one.

“You fucking idiot. How dare you decide what you think I deserve and what I don’t. Here I am, scolding myself and beating myself up for falling for this arrogant, sweet, careful, straight Cuban guy when you were literally dying and I didn’t know. Do you have any idea how terrified I’ve been those past few hours? They felt like the longest hours of my life, not knowing whether you will make it or not. I have listened to every joke, every comment you have ever made. Every pickup line you have every said and wished with every fibre of my being that you would once use them on me. You kept throwing yourself at these girls who didn’t know how precious you are and how sensitive you are and how incredible talented you are when I was right there, waiting, hoping, wanting. God, Lance, I love you. I have been since the beginning.”

Lance let out a sob. He and Keith held each other’s hands, shaking with relief and exhaustion. He was so tired, mentally and physically from everything. He almost forgot where they were when he felt a sharp pain in his lungs. The pain continued to spread until it was overtaking his entire chest area. He let out a gasp and then a pained cry. He couldn’t hold it in anymore, it was getting too much.

Keith stood and ran to the door and yelled in the hallway.

“Someone HELP!!! WE NEED HELP HERE PLEASE!”

It didn’t take two seconds for the doctors to rush in and everything went black.

* * *

 

Watching the doctors move quickly to see what the hell happened to Lance, for the second time that day, was more than his own heart could handle.

He still didn’t believe half of what Lance said but kept thinking that this is all some twisted dream and that he was going to wake up at Lance’s place, on the couch with Shiro drooling on the opposite couch and everything would be exactly the same.

But the lingering feeling of Lance holding his hand was real. It grounded him, reminding him that he was real, that this was real. And that what’s happening to Lance right now was, also, very much real.

The rest of paladins were all piled outside, on the chairs and floor, surrounding Lance’s family. Veronica and Marco were holding their mother’s hand absolutely terrified while their father gently spoke to his wife trying to calm her down.

He stood outside the room a second time for what felt like hours, but was actually ten minutes. The doctor that called him into Lance’s room once again came out.

“I’m here to calm you all down, what just happened was a reaction from his body against the bud to try and expel it out after it had served its purpose. Usually if it wasn’t so advanced, the host would simply cough it out. But in this case, the thorns were too embedded into his organs that any harsh removal would’ve made the situation worse. Lance is an incredibly lucky guy and is set to make a full recovery.”

Keith stood next to Shiro and slid down to his level where he was sitting on the floor.

“Keith.” Shiro called out to him gently. “Are you okay?”

“It was me.” He felt numb. “It was actually me.”

Shiro wrapped his arms around Keith. He melted into the warmth of his friend. For once things felt like it might actually have a silver lining.

**Author's Note:**

> The procedure i used to drain the blood is LOOSELY based on an actual very detailed procedure called Thoracentesis. This one however, wouldn't be done at the scene, it needs an x-ray thus a hospital :)
> 
> Follow me on tumblr @no-i-didnt-notice-im-short
> 
> Dont forget to leave Kudos/Comments <3
> 
> You can also Check out Blue Petals from My Works for more Keith Angst (its basically the opposite)


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